We’re the Believers. Do you believe us?

The Believers cricket team, presumably founded on the back of these immortal words from Rizzle Kicks’ debut album, became yet another victim of the 2013 Stuart Barker Badger Experience. Lulled into a false sense of security by a lacklustre Badger batting display, they were later dismantled by a Nick Foord 5-wicket haul and sent back to their Brighton rap idols shame-faced and empty-handed.

Inspired by the looming power station on the horizon, the Badgers hot-footed it to the crease, keen to take advantage of the short Battersea Park boundary. However, despite providing great entertainment for the crowd, mainly though a hilarious Josh Lee run-out, they could only amass a paltry 144, with only Shone, Morse and Foord progressing past the 20-run mark.

The Badgers were stung and none more so than Mcluskey who continued to bemoan the fact that he had been bowled by someone with ‘such a public school run-up.’ Barker’s famous man-management skills were needed in spades and he proceeded to pep up his team for action – each player being provided with their own personal pick-me-up. A chance for Dollimore to extend his impressive economy figures. An opportunity for Morse to get right up in the batsmen’s faces. The prospect of endless ball polishing for Cloke. And a promise of a weekend trip to Infernos for Cole.

Early breakthroughs were the name of the game and these were delivered by Foord and Dollimore, with none of the Believers’ top four batsmen making it into double figures. Foord maintained his relentless attack, ferociously hurling the leather ball at the stumps as if it was floret of broccoli stinking out one of his famous barbeques. The wickets continued to tumble and he ended his assault with five scalps at the measly price of 0.8 runs per wicket.

The Badgers proceeded to wrap up the tail, Barker proceeded to widen his grin and the game was won by 58 runs.

Sunday 18th August 2013 Believers Believers vs Badgers Battersea Badgers

Battersea Badgers 144 for 10 (27 overs)

  • Morse 31 (32)
  • Foord 23 (17)
  • Shone 22 (19)
  • Unknown 5/37 (8)
  • Unknown 3/37 (8)

Believers 86 for 10 (20 overs)

  • Unknown 34 (0)
  • Foord 5/4 (4)
  • Dollimore 2/22 (6)
  • Marchant 2/23 (4.2)
Full scorecard
  1. Kingstonians Jinksed by Mystery Balls

    Kingstonian match report 30th Jun 2018 — by Josh Lee
  2. Blockbuster Badgers Down The Thesps

    Thespian Thunderers match report 13th Jun 2018 — by Josh Lee
  3. The Worst Toilet in Scotland

    Plastics match report 9th Jun 2018 — by Josh Lee
  4. Warmongering in Wimbledon

    Wimbledonians match report 3rd Jun 2018 — by Josh Lee
  5. Clokey are you ok? So, Clokey are you ok? Are you ok Clokey?

    Ripley match report 27th May 2018 — by Josh Lee
  6. The Government steals one!

    His Majesty's Treasury and Cabinet Office match report 24th May 2018 — by Paul Cole
  7. The House of Stewarts/Stuarts

    Believers match report 20th May 2018 — by Josh Lee
  8. An Un-re-"Markle"ble Performance

    Corinthians match report 13th May 2018 — by Josh Lee
  9. Starting with a Bang (and a Hangover)

    Addiscombe match report 21st Apr 2018 — by Peter Cade
  10. Who Said Draws Weren’t Exciting?

    Southbank match report 17th Sep 2017 — by Josh Lee
  11. Captain Foord to the rescue

    Addiscombe match report 16th Sep 2017 — by Josh Lee
  12. Badgers and Australia suffer humiliating losses

    SLIC match report 23rd Feb 2017 — by Martin Cloke
  13. Badgers reclaim South-London Ashes

    KRCSC match report 29th Jan 2017 — by Chris Shone
  14. “I do!” (as long as you let me play cricket tomorrow)

    Itinerants match report 18th Jan 2017 — by Chris Shone
  15. Flooded again

    Faire match report 14th Jan 2017 — by Chris Shone
  16. Chocaholics Anonymous

    Kingstonian match report 13th Jan 2017 — by Robin Mackrell
  17. Spinning is winning

    Wimbledonians match report 11th Jan 2017 — by Josh Lee
  18. Single O Seven

    Seveno match report 10th Jan 2017 — by Josh Lee
  19. You only bat twice

    KRCSC match report 7th Jan 2017 — by Peter Warman
  20. Jan, Bam are all man

    Seveno match report 20th Nov 2016 — by Peter Cade
Older Articles